See Also: STUPIDITY

1. The fault unknown is as a thought unacted —William Shakespeare
2. Ignorance is a form of incompetence —Natsume Söseki
3. Ignorance is like a delicate exotic fruit; touch it and the bloom is gone —Oscar Wilde
4. Ignorance like a fire does burn —Bayard Taylor

   Modernized from “Like a fire doth burn.”

5. Ignorant as dirt —Karl Shapiro
6. A man’s ignorance is as much his private property, and as precious in his own eyes, as his family Bible —Oliver Wendell Holmes, Sr.
7. A man with little learning is like the frog who thinks its puddle a great sea —Burmese proverb
8. There are a great multitude of individuals who are like blind mules, anxious enough to kick, but can’t tell where —Josh Billings

   Here are the words as they appear in Billing’s phonetic dialect: “a grate multitude … but kant tell whare.”

(See also FATUOUSNESS.)

blockhead A dimwit, a numskull. The term comes from the dummy head used by wigmakers and hatters.

cork-brained Light-headed; giddy. This phrase plays with the analogy between cork cells which are dead, air-filled cells and one’s brain. Cork-brained appeared in print as early as 1630.

dunce A dull-witted, stupid person; a dolt, blockhead, or ignoramus. This term makes use of the name of a scholastic theologian of the late 13th century, John Duns Scotus. Originally the term referred to a caviling sophist, derived from the fact that Scotus’ doctrines were criticized as a conglomeration of hairsplitting distinctions. Such a person would be full of useless information and perhaps even opposed to progress and learning, as Scotus was regarded.

Dunce also referred to one who is uneducated or incapable of learning.

Today dunce has lost its connotations of overrefinement and pedantry; it means simply ‘stupid, doltish, ignorant’

dunderhead A thickheaded, stupid person; a numskull, blockhead, or dullard. The origin of this term is obscure, but it has been speculated that dunder is a corruption of the Spanish redundar ‘to overflow’ and is the name given to the lees or dregs of cane juice used in the fermentation of rum. Thus, a “dunderhead” is a head full of dregs, overflowing with this worthless substance. This term has been in use since the early 17th century.

not know A from a windmill To be extremely ignorant or stupid. This expression is said to have been originally suggested by the similarity between the shape of a capital A and that of a windmill. This theory is further reinforced by the now rare or obsolete definition of windmill found in the OED: “a figure of a windmill; a sign or character resembling this, as a cross or asterisk.” In popular usage until the late 19th century, the phrase appeared as early as 1402 in the Rolls of Parliament.

not know B from a battledore To be illiterate, ignorant, or obtuse. Battledore is an obsolete word for a hornbook used as a child’s primer. Not to know the letter from the book signified utter ignorance.

Many alliterative variations of the phrase exist, substituting broomstick, bull’s foot, or buffalo’s foot for battledore.

not know if one is coming or going See CONFUSION.

not know one’s ass [or Brit arse] from one’s elbow Not know the first thing about something, not know what’s what, completely ignorant or naïve.

not know shit from shinola To be totally stupid or ignorant. Shinola is the brand name of a formerly popular shoe polish little used today. Because of its vulgar origin and implications, the phrase is somewhat limited in written usage.

not know which end is up Not know what’s going on; ignorant, stupid; totally confused or mixed up.

out to lunch Stupid, daft, or flaky; socially incompetent. This expression relates physical absence to mental vacuity. The common phrase often describes a person whose social ineptness or exceedingly poor judgment is due to a severe lack of common sense.